This page has all the dialogues for Mr. Resetti in the game Super Smash Bros. Brawl. These dialogues appear when a player uses an Assist Trophy and Mr. Resetti appears from it.
With the exception of the very first speech he only says once in the game, all other dialogues after that one are randomly said.
Intro
(This script is the very first speech that Resetti will say only once in the game. Mr. Resetti appears when the Assist Trophy is used.)
Mr. Resetti:
HEY!
NO RESETTIN'!
YOU HEAR ME?!
Huh? You sayin' you never reset nothin'?
Oh, well, uh.... Guess we ain't got a problem then.
So, lemme introduce myself. Name's Resetti. Mr. Resetti.
On behalf of the family I'd like to show youse.... I mean show YOU, um....
Uh, show you.... Aw, forget it! How's a mole supposed to remember this garbage? HUH?
Let's cut to the chase. Ever hear of Animal Crossing? Yeah? Well, that's where I'm from.
I'm the guy who stops cheaters from cheatin'. The no-resettin' policy enforcer, ya follow?
Ya break the rules, ya gotta deal with the mole in charge here.
I'm like the....how you say....conscience of Animal Crossing.
And, uh, I ain't one to toot my own horn or nothin', but I'm a big deal. I'm the most popular—What's that? You ain't got time for this?
You wanna know what it is I'm doin' here?
You ain't heard a word I said, that it? You got potatoes in your ears, punk? HUH?
This is Super Smash something or other, ain't it?
Yeah? Then quit complainin'. I'm SUPPOSED to be here. I'm the star of the show, twerp!
Huh? What's that? I'm in the way? Ya can't see the screen?
KEEP CRYIN', PUNK!
I got a little news for ya! It don't matter if you're resettin' anything, OK?
I'm gonna be poppin' up now an' again, so you'd better be ready for your daily dose of mole!
It ain't like this is all earthworms and mudbaths for me, pal. I'm just followin' orders. We clear?
SCRAM!
(Mr. Resetti disappears.)
Resetti Dialogue 1
(Mr. Resetti appears when the Assist Trophy is used.)
Mr. Resetti:
GRAARR!
NO....RESETTIN'!
UNDERSTAND?!
Whoa.... Phew.... Gotta catch....my breath....
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I hear ya. Stop whinin' already!
"But no one reset anything! Blah blah dee dah." That's what you wanna tell me, right?
You ain't gotta say a thing. I can see it in your eyes. They're, uh, real expressive.
Comin' out here is just something I gotta do, get me? Stop gettin' so worked up.
It's like crust on bread, you know what I mean?
Cut it off, leave it on, who really cares, am I right?
It's no big deal, one way or another, get me?
Look, I don't wanna be here. I got places to be, ya know?
I got a load of wet clothes sittin' in my washin' machine.
I don't get 'em hung up quick, it's wrinkle city. Think I wanna look like a naked mole rat? Nuh-uh!
And the stench? Don't get me started.
But when duty calls, I gotta answer. It's in my contract.
Lemme tell ya about Assist Trophies, all right?
They're items that call up who knows what.
Most of the time, it's some good egg who's gonna help you lay down the law.
That's a good thing. Like a nice, shiny new pick.
Waitin' to see who shows up will get that ticker pumpin', believe you me.
But that ain't what happens when I'm on the job, get me?
I ain't here to take sides. I'm like one of them countries that don't fight in wars. Neutral, right?
I could help, but I don't. See, I gotta show all you punks some self-control.
It's that whole "tough love" song and dance. I gotta tell ya, it ain't easy on me, neither.
Yo, punk! You ain't gonna get nowhere bumpin' into me.
Whack me with a hammer, swing me for the fences with one of them bats, it don't matter.
None of that junk works on me. I'm like a super mole, ya follow?
And sometimes, I just go KA-BLAM!
(Mr. Resetti explodes.)
Mr. Resetti:
SO WATCH IT, PUNK!
All right, then.... It's about time for me to get tunnelin'....
Oh, yeah, one last thing....
Take a bath, will ya? It's gettin' ripe in here! Now....
SCRAM!
(Mr. Resetti disappears.)
Resetti Dialogue 2
(Mr. Resetti appears when the Assist Trophy is used.)
Mr. Resetti:
GRAARR!
I TOLD YOU! NO RESETTIN'!
WHAT DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?!
Ooh.... World's gettin' dark.... ....Gotta stop spinnin'.... Whew.
All that yellin' got me dizzy. Ain't enough air around here. Throat hurts, too!
So whaddya want? Huh? You called me, didn't ya?
Yeah, I know, it's my job, so there's no point in gettin' my whiskers twisted, but....
When the sirens go off in HQ, I gotta start diggin'.
It don't matter what I'm doin', I gotta drop it an' go.
I'm eatin' dinner? Plate's on the floor, fork's in the ceilin'. In the tub? Wet mole.
Don't believe me? Feel my fur! Go on, touch it! TOUCH IT! Point is, I ain't got a choice.
None of you punks can see it, but all I'm wearin' downstairs is a towel!
I got dirt clods in places they don't belong, understand?
And another thing....
What's the big idea treatin' me like an item, huh?
If I could move around on my own? Join this here brawl? Oooh, look out!
I would tear this place right UP! Mole elbow over here! BAM! Dirt nap there! SLAM!
[Character 1].... [Character 2].... You'd be runnin' home to Mama!
Grr! What a rip-off! Where's it written that moles gotta stay underground? HUH?
Aw.... Forget it. Bein' a burrowin' mammal ain't ALL bad, ya know?
I got dirt and worms....an'....dirt.... Well, I get to tell YOU what's what, right? Set you straight....
That's good enough for me.... You bet it is....
....Sniff....
I ain't cryin', I got dirt in my eye, you hear what I'm sayin'?! RESETTI DON'T CRY!
Listen, punk, bein' able to hop and jump all over the place ain't all it's cracked up to be.
You don't stretch right, you could twist an ankle or twang a hamstring or somethin'.
All that punchin' and kickin' has gotta be hard on a body.
I got no problem with you showin' off your moves. Some of 'em are pretty fancy, but....
What I don't wanna see is any scrappin' 'bout who won and who lost, ya hear?
Whew! I'm gonna run my yap this much, I gotta buy me some of them throat lozenges.
All right, then.... I'm gonna hit the tunnels.
Do me a favor, will ya?
Use the restroom before ya hit the sack! Now....
SCRAM!
(Mr. Resetti disappears.)
Resetti Dialogue 3
(Mr. Resetti appears when the Assist Trophy is used.)
Mr. Resetti:
GRAARR!
You just don't get it, do ya, punk?!
IT AIN'T ROCKET SCIENCE, BUB!
All ya gotta do is NOT reset!
This ain't the time for more roughhousin', twerps!
Your attention. I WANT IT! Hey! I'm talkin' to YOU! LOOK....OVER....HERE!
It's all I ever hear, I swear: "Resetti's an utter maniac." "Meanest mole ever."
Well, I've been workin' on a little somethin' to show ya.
Got a few tips from this pygmy shrew voted class clown at tunnelin' school.
This works out all right, I might pack up my pick and hit the comedy circuit!
I think you're gonna like this, so sit back and relax.
First up! Impersonations. You know, where I talk like somebody else, get me?
My impersonation of [Character]!
[Character Impersonation]
Well? Huh? How was that? Dead ringer, right?
What? Dead stinker?
....
Hold it.... You laughin' at me? THERE! I saw your nose twitchin'! Now you did it!
UGWAAH!
You're marked for LIFE! I ain't NEVER forgivin' you for this!
Comedy hour's done, but you got front-row seats to a prime-time horror fest!
Claws? Check! Pick? Check! Rage-filled mole? Double-check! This is gonna get ugly!
GRAARR!
OUCH!
My.... My....back.... Oh, boy.... Musta pinched....a nerve....
My chiropractor warned me not to get too worked up....
All this diggin' got my spine outta whack. I'm supposed to be takin' it easy.
That's good news for you, 'cause it means I'm outta here.
Guess I ain't got what it takes to keep up with you. I'm gettin' old, ya know?
Oh, but one last thing....
Get some shut-eye, will ya? Stayin' up late's for punks! Now....
SCRAM!
(Mr. Resetti disappears.)
Impersonations
Impersonations that Mr. Resetti will make of a character in the field of battle. The character that gets impersonated during a match is random.
Captain Falcon:
FALCON PUUUNCH!
Pikachu:
PI-KA-CHUUU!
Wario:
WA HA HA!
Pit:
Great Palutena, victory is ours!
R.O.B.:
SHOGOOOOOOOOOO!
Mario:
HEE-YAHOO!
Kirby:
HIIIIIII!
Marth:
Minna! Mitekure!
Diddy Kong:
HEEYA! HEEYAAAA!
Captain Olimar:
Pikmin! Pikmin!
Donkey Kong:
GUH-RAAH!
Ike:
Great! Aether!
Sheik:
SHUH! MUH!
Fox McCloud:
Mission complete!
Mr. Game & Watch:
Pikopikopikopiko.
Falco Lombardi:
Hands off my prey!
Meta Knight:
HEEYAYAYAYA!
Ness:
PK thunder!
King Dedede:
GWAHAHA!
Lucario:
My aura!
Link:
SCRAAAAAH!
Solid Snake:
This is Snake. I'm done here.
Zero Suit Samus:
HA!
Toon Link:
CHA!
Ice Climbers:
TA! OH-HEEYAH!
Charizard:
Way to go, Charizard!
Princess Peach:
HA-CHA!
Squirtle: Go get 'em, Squirtle!
Jigglypuff:
PUFF!
Yoshi:
HYUM! PON!
Princess Zelda:
HA! OH!
Wolf O'Donnel:
Play time's over, Star Fox!
Samus Aran:
MEEEER! PSHOOOW!
Gannondorf:
Ha ha ha ha!
Lucas:
PK freeze!
Bowser:
Bwahahahahahahahaha...
Luigi:
L-let's a-go!
Sonic the Hedgehog:
You're too slow!
Ivysaur:
Do it, Ivysaur!
Misc
Sometimes if the player attacks Mr. Resetti too much, Resetti will explode for a bit during one of his speeches. If Mr. Resetti scrolls off the screen, he will also yell at the player.
When attacked too much
Mr Resetti:
Think you don't gotta listen to me? Hey!
Off-screen
Mr Resetti:
H-hey! Don't you ditch me, punk!